A note to whomever holds my notebooks and journals

My notebooks and journals that have been left behind were never meant as a means to start wars or define the future forever......they are and have been my thoughts through some very turbulent, treacherous times where I was lonely and extremely confused, not knowing who to trust or whether I could trust anyone at all.....They were never meant as a vessel to carry out acts of aggression, hatred or for trying to get even with any entity.....they were all I had when people were not available to me and meant as a way to purge my psyche to make room for more of what my difficult life chose to throw my way.....To use them against individuals now when they were solely created to let me write my way through difficult traumatic times would cause me even more truama as they were never meant to be viewed or seen by others and although you having them makes me feel exploited, the bigger issue right now is that I am trying to convey that I have always just been trying to "make sense of things" but doesn't guarantee that I am always right about things....A lot of things written were written during periods of extreme fright..... ARAT does not equal "a rat" it was a code for something else.... By the way this is the only way I can tell you this, to those of you that hopefully know who you are, I LOVE U and I MISS U.....whether you've been in my life for my entire life or you've been in my life for only a few months this is how I feel........... By the way, I HATE EASTER and any eating habits at all are not me agreeing to be Jesus for anyone at all, Im just gonna ignore the entire day as it freaks me out (no offense to the actual Jesus) and the geo metro I had to leave behind in October 2012 was left in Orange county, not Los Angeles, but I did take a flight out of Los Angeles when I flew to Vegas.......