I just visited with my son and the hospital security tells me to go into a waiting room so they can talk to me, so I accomodate.
They start grilling me about the "Parent/Guardian" sticker that I had on my clothes from the day before visiting with my son because they want to "confiscate" it from me. They basically started demanding the sticker from me and it must have fallen off because I couldn't find it and then they started accusing me of lying because they saw it earlier. I wasn't lying, I had held my son for the last 30 minutes and it must have fallen off.
Then when they couldn't get that they started demanding that I give them the blue bracelet that was on my arm. One security guard even tried to bring out a pair of scissors from his jacket to cut it off my body!
What the heck is going on when you get backed into a corner and security once again starts thinking they are above the law and are getting ready to once again, try and put their hands on me..................who the heck allows this from them? If the situation was reversed and I tried to put my hands on them I would have been tackled, hurt in the process and arrested but they just think that it is alright to attempt to put their hands on me.
Im beyond tired of this kind of treatment behind closed doors from the hospital.
Thats not all, while I am attempting to hold and bond with my child I am accused of being "fake" towards my kid with my remarks and want to hold him, from the female nurse in the room.
The male nurse that was the attending nurse got irritated that I wanted to hold my own son and made me wait 15 minutes before helping me when I only have an hour with my son to begin with. I did wait, as patiently as I could, for him to finally come over to me and my son and when he did, he told me that he then had to check his vitals and that this (vitals) was done every three hours. My response to him was "You have my son for 23 hours out of the day and I have been waiting for all this time (out of my 1 hour a day that you are allowing me with my own child), and you want to take his vitals now? You cant do this in the 23 hours that you keep me away from my own kid?"
Then at the end of my visit the male nurse told me to "back down" (his exact words) because their is another girl that thinks that she is a better fit parent than me and the hospital staff is not only expecting me to "compete" for the rights to my own son but they are also starting to subtly demand that I just leave my son behind and allow this other woman to have rights to my kid. Then he proceeded to threaten me with a subtle visual cue after he said these words.
Since when do I have to "compete" for my own flesh and blood. NOOOOOOOOOOO, I dont have to compete, that is my son no matter what you think that you have a right to do to my life for not adhering to your demands.
Im not a freaken criminal and I have done nothing wrong, but what they are doing is trying to threaten and scare me out of my own child not to mention ignoring laws in the process.
Also some woman falsely accused me of stealing her IPOD two years ago along with her engagement ring and $200+, that she gave to the drug dealer to finance her and another girls 3 day drug binge that I refused to participate in from two years ago. Her fiance was in drug rehab and she didn't want him to find out so she just blamed me for all the missing valuables and cash (which by the way I didn't find out about til a week later when she acted all upset upon seeing me in the mall. She played it off real good with her proclamation that stated "I feel like kicking your ass!" as she clung to her fiance. I did hear that she continued the lie with "I'll let you off the hook this time" comment. Someone said that she said that but I dont know because I wasn't there..........for any of the story!
Needless to say, I was dumbfounded! NO I didn't steal anything from her, in fact I brought her engagement ring to her and cautioned her to pay attention because she had left her hotel door wide open with her wedding ring sitting in clear sight. I was the one who brought it to her attention. Thats what I get for helping to babysit. I have nothing against her but I am tired of being lied about. Hope her and her fiance make it.
Then there is Charles Bettencourt, He decided that he would lie and tell the world that I rung up charges on his credit card without his permission at a Hilton Hotel......yes charles, now the truth is coming out. Here's what happened. Charles OFFERED to put me up in a hotel for two nights shortly after I found out I was pregnant in the city of Pleasanton. He also okayed me to order room service becuase I hadnt eaten. I didn't do anything that he didn't consent to and now I hear that he wants me to take my time for that event. I have nothing against Mr. Bettencourt and hope he has a wonderful life but I dont understand offering to help someone then turning around and accusing me of something illeagal. I did nothing illeagal.
I just want to raise a happy healthy kid and be left alone with all this DRAMA that is needless in our lives. Im not a criminal, quit accusing me of stealing and just leave me alone. Im really tired of getting threatened when I've done nothing wrong or when I refuse to participate in "competition". I dont have to compete this is already MY LIFE.
I WONDER HOW MANY OTHER LIES YOU'VE BEEN TOLD IN REGARD TO ME AND MY LIFE?!
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Are you trying to charge me with the following....
In the Criminal Defense Clinic (CDC), student defenders represent indigent clients charged with misdemeanors in the New York City Criminal Court. Student defenders meet their clients at arraignments (the initial court appearance in New York) and remain as counsel until the charges are resolved. Students perform the full range of lawyering tasks associated with criminal defense, including interviewing, negotiating, counseling and the full range of pretrial and trial responsibilities. Clinic clients face a variety of charges, including drug possession, assault, petty larceny, obstructing governmental administration, resisting arrest, and disorderly conduct. In keeping with the Clinic’s goal of providing holistic and thorough representation, student defenders represent and assist their clients in a variety of related contexts.
THE ABOVE EXCERPT WAS TAKEN FROM LAW.CUNY.EDU
I have never impeded governmental administration, the resisting arrests were my effort to protect myself from the physical harm that I was subjected to, I've never assaulted anyone on purpose, I haven;t done any type of drugs in years and years and never have I been arrested for drug possession, I have receipts for everything I have ever bought (@least 99% of it-very few reciepts have been lost, probably 12 of them), disorderly conduct was something that the officer made up in order to take me to jail and I would like you to prove otherwise and that these things weren't malicious attacks on an autistic woman!
Prove it!!!!!!!! Since your so hell bent on making my life miserable I think that you should have to work at it slightly at leas. Im just trying to be a regular person and get on with my life. You have got me painted as a really bad person.
By the way, I have the receipts WITH ME!
aND i AM BEING ACCUSED OF BEING JEALOUS, JEALOUS OF WHAT, i DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU ARE REFERING TO ---- DONT YOU UNDERSTAND ALL OF YOUR EXTRA TIME IS RESULTING IN YOU PICKING ME APART FOR NO REASON. iM NOT JEALOUS, iM ONLY HERE TO DEAL WITH MY AILING INFANT. hE IS MINE AND ITS COMPLETELY ILLEAGAL WHAT YOU ARE DOING TO ME AND MY CHILD.
THE ABOVE EXCERPT WAS TAKEN FROM LAW.CUNY.EDU
I have never impeded governmental administration, the resisting arrests were my effort to protect myself from the physical harm that I was subjected to, I've never assaulted anyone on purpose, I haven;t done any type of drugs in years and years and never have I been arrested for drug possession, I have receipts for everything I have ever bought (@least 99% of it-very few reciepts have been lost, probably 12 of them), disorderly conduct was something that the officer made up in order to take me to jail and I would like you to prove otherwise and that these things weren't malicious attacks on an autistic woman!
Prove it!!!!!!!! Since your so hell bent on making my life miserable I think that you should have to work at it slightly at leas. Im just trying to be a regular person and get on with my life. You have got me painted as a really bad person.
By the way, I have the receipts WITH ME!
aND i AM BEING ACCUSED OF BEING JEALOUS, JEALOUS OF WHAT, i DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU ARE REFERING TO ---- DONT YOU UNDERSTAND ALL OF YOUR EXTRA TIME IS RESULTING IN YOU PICKING ME APART FOR NO REASON. iM NOT JEALOUS, iM ONLY HERE TO DEAL WITH MY AILING INFANT. hE IS MINE AND ITS COMPLETELY ILLEAGAL WHAT YOU ARE DOING TO ME AND MY CHILD.
Something is going on, but Im not sure what
Heres what just happened.
Im holding my baby and I look up at the security guard standing next to me and he has this look of irritation on his face as my son cozies up to me and falls asleep in my arms. He didn't think I would look up at that moment and the expression on his face indicated that he was in deep distress that my infant LOVES me.
Then after my visitation of one hour is up and we go down to the first floor, he high fives another guard with glee and I hear the other guard say "he's going!".
This after we had just shared an elevator with what looks like the babies father's sister (In which I asked her if she has a brother named "John" and she replies no.) She herself looks about 18 at the most and I suddenly have a strange feeling that in the last few weeks while I was hospitalized that some strange things have been going on. She is dressed in dark grey and black (I wont say what that signifies).
It looks to me as if a lot of people have been lying about me in order to get the baby's father "John" and his family "in" with a certain group of people. Looks like it is their intention of taking the baby away from me and keeping him away from me. The security guards must be moonlighting as security guards while I am in the hospital and I would bet that they peel their security labels off once I exit the hospital.
It seems as if a lot of people are all jittery and upset while I am around. I feel like I am being set up.
The tube holding up the cannula falls apart while Im holding my son and the nurse aids us (the baby and I) in putting it in a safe place among the pillow that me and my son are on.
Something is going on alright, I just dont know what, but it looks like a certain "population" is trying to make my life intolerable by making me lose family and freinds and support of the people that I care about including my infant.
Im not consenting to anything, I feel like its a set up.
Im holding my baby and I look up at the security guard standing next to me and he has this look of irritation on his face as my son cozies up to me and falls asleep in my arms. He didn't think I would look up at that moment and the expression on his face indicated that he was in deep distress that my infant LOVES me.
Then after my visitation of one hour is up and we go down to the first floor, he high fives another guard with glee and I hear the other guard say "he's going!".
This after we had just shared an elevator with what looks like the babies father's sister (In which I asked her if she has a brother named "John" and she replies no.) She herself looks about 18 at the most and I suddenly have a strange feeling that in the last few weeks while I was hospitalized that some strange things have been going on. She is dressed in dark grey and black (I wont say what that signifies).
It looks to me as if a lot of people have been lying about me in order to get the baby's father "John" and his family "in" with a certain group of people. Looks like it is their intention of taking the baby away from me and keeping him away from me. The security guards must be moonlighting as security guards while I am in the hospital and I would bet that they peel their security labels off once I exit the hospital.
It seems as if a lot of people are all jittery and upset while I am around. I feel like I am being set up.
The tube holding up the cannula falls apart while Im holding my son and the nurse aids us (the baby and I) in putting it in a safe place among the pillow that me and my son are on.
Something is going on alright, I just dont know what, but it looks like a certain "population" is trying to make my life intolerable by making me lose family and freinds and support of the people that I care about including my infant.
Im not consenting to anything, I feel like its a set up.
The Latest
These immature people never stop trying to accuse me of being a groupie!
I cant go anywhere or get anything accomplished without being accused of wanting to partake in some groupie fest.
Can I tell these people one more time that...............
1. My actions have nothing to do with an entertainer
2. I have a sick child to worry about and you are increadibly rediculous to be thinking that my thought processes have anything to do with your rediculous rhelm of "OMG, Look who just walked by!"
***Once in awhile I might mention that the person I am talking to resembles someone in the entertainment industry but thats about it******
3. Also your group of people has systematically ruined my existance over the last couple of years as you are so superficial to accuse me of caring about your actions before I would care about me and my son being in life or death situations.
4. Im tired of you copying my blogs and passing them off as your own, and also tired of you turning my own words around on me to try and make people think that you are the originator of so-many-I-lost-count ideas and verbage.
5. I would really appreciate if you left any accusations of being a groupie or anything else that is totally inappropriate, given my sons current condition, out of the equation when I go visit my child. Im a mom, and he's my son and my child is NOT a superstar...He's an infant....get a grip. My life is my kid and I dont appreciate people trying to make me "guilty" of anything simply because I have a 1 hour visitation with my child that I look forward to the minute my visitation is over for the day.
6. I REALLY DONT WANT YOUR MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I MIGHT SAY THAT HE IS SUPER CUTE LIKE A NORMAL WOMAN BUT NO MATTER WHAT I SAY ABOUT HIM I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO MY OWN MEMORIES OF MY FRIENDS AND EX'S BUT WE AREN'T IN JUNIOR HIGH ANYMORE AND i PROMISE THAT I REALLY CAN KEEP IT ON AN ADULT LEVEL. YOU DONT GET TO CONTROL MY THOUGHTS. ONE MORE TIME....NO MATTER WHAT I THINK, I STILL AM NOT PLOTTING OR THINKING OF HOW TO GET YOUR MAN........TIRED OF REPEATING THIS ONE.
7. I REALLY WISH TO BE SURROUNDED BY ADULT PEOPLE WITH POSITIVE GOALS AND ATTITUDE FROM HERE ON OUT.
8. I reserve the right to pick up gossipy magazines for time-wasting purposes only and as a form of entertainment.
9. My son is NOT up for adoption. Although me and his father are flattered that you would consider him, thanks anyway from us.
10. IM HOPING THAT AS I CONTINUE TO SHATTER YOUR VIEWS ON HOW AND WHAT I SHOULD BE THAT YOU WILL FINALLY GET USED TO THE IDEA THAT I AM NOT PLAYING.
11. In the same breathe I will repeat to you that I am AUTISTIC (AND NOW HAVE A FORMAL DIAGNOSIS THAT SAYS SO) I will occasionally say and do things that make no sense to you because of the autism such as but not limited to, having an aversion to simple or complex things that I have attatched a not-so-great specific meaning to. YOu will see me sometimes stop eating for a period of days at times because of some far off superstition or binge eating when I have no other outlet.
MY BEST ADVISE IF YOU ARE TRYING TO FIGURE ME OUT IS TO STOP TRYING TO FIGURE ME OUT BECAUSE MY ACTIONS ARE TOTALLY RANDOM AND NOT PRE-PLANNED. THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I SUDDENLY BECOME AFRAID OF SOMETHING THAT DIDN'T SPOOK ME THE DAY BEFORE AND NONE OF MY PERSONALITY HAS TO DO WITH A GAME, SOMETIMES IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE TO ME EITHER.
12. My son's father is NOT the man from Canada/Maine and I have only been sexually active (intercourse) twice in three years so that rules him out and my sons due date was 10/12/2009 (He was three weeks early, if you do the math that rules out man from canada because the man from canada was in the picture for two days only and in the first half of November --- which would mean that I was pregnant for 11 months?--- I dont think so!!! Man from San Mateo is my sons father, we were together the first part of December.) SO QUIT CALLING ME A GROUPIE!!!!!! YOU ARE ALWAYS CONDUCTING YOUR RUINING OF MY LIFE BASED ON FALSE PRETENSES---ITS GETTING REALLY OLD.
13. Quit lying to key figures to get me in trouble, I have nothing what-so- ever against members of any organization including the president and I am not a threat to peoples safety, Im autistic and have normal autistic adversions as well as mannerisms including outbursts (that are now limited because of the medication...thank goodness for myself and everyone else too) I am learning how to better handle things internally without so much outward frustration, but your lies definitely are not helping.
14. If I take the bart, I am not advocating making anyone "starve" or global practices,....most likly I am looking for a job.
15. I've wanted rescue from this hectic existance of having to deal with people that destroy my life for sport for 6 years now and I have wanted the abuse to end. Im going on with my life because I cant not live any longer. Nothing is a game to me, this is my life and my sons also.
I AM AN INTELLIGENT AND VALUABLE PERSON THAT IS CREATIVE IN NATURE AND MOST OF THE TIME EXTREMELY GENTLE THAT CAN BE FUNNY AND A GREAT ASSET TO MANY.........IF YOUR ONLY GOAL IS TO HURT ME THEN I DONT UNDERSTAND YOUR EXISTANCE, NOR DO I WANT TO BE A PART OF SUCH AN ENVIRONMENT......PLEASE LEAVE ME OUT OF THAT....THE POSITION OF MAJOR JERK HAS ALREADY BEEN FILLED IN MY LIFE.
Sincerely
Laci Renee
I cant go anywhere or get anything accomplished without being accused of wanting to partake in some groupie fest.
Can I tell these people one more time that...............
1. My actions have nothing to do with an entertainer
2. I have a sick child to worry about and you are increadibly rediculous to be thinking that my thought processes have anything to do with your rediculous rhelm of "OMG, Look who just walked by!"
***Once in awhile I might mention that the person I am talking to resembles someone in the entertainment industry but thats about it******
3. Also your group of people has systematically ruined my existance over the last couple of years as you are so superficial to accuse me of caring about your actions before I would care about me and my son being in life or death situations.
4. Im tired of you copying my blogs and passing them off as your own, and also tired of you turning my own words around on me to try and make people think that you are the originator of so-many-I-lost-count ideas and verbage.
5. I would really appreciate if you left any accusations of being a groupie or anything else that is totally inappropriate, given my sons current condition, out of the equation when I go visit my child. Im a mom, and he's my son and my child is NOT a superstar...He's an infant....get a grip. My life is my kid and I dont appreciate people trying to make me "guilty" of anything simply because I have a 1 hour visitation with my child that I look forward to the minute my visitation is over for the day.
6. I REALLY DONT WANT YOUR MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I MIGHT SAY THAT HE IS SUPER CUTE LIKE A NORMAL WOMAN BUT NO MATTER WHAT I SAY ABOUT HIM I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO MY OWN MEMORIES OF MY FRIENDS AND EX'S BUT WE AREN'T IN JUNIOR HIGH ANYMORE AND i PROMISE THAT I REALLY CAN KEEP IT ON AN ADULT LEVEL. YOU DONT GET TO CONTROL MY THOUGHTS. ONE MORE TIME....NO MATTER WHAT I THINK, I STILL AM NOT PLOTTING OR THINKING OF HOW TO GET YOUR MAN........TIRED OF REPEATING THIS ONE.
7. I REALLY WISH TO BE SURROUNDED BY ADULT PEOPLE WITH POSITIVE GOALS AND ATTITUDE FROM HERE ON OUT.
8. I reserve the right to pick up gossipy magazines for time-wasting purposes only and as a form of entertainment.
9. My son is NOT up for adoption. Although me and his father are flattered that you would consider him, thanks anyway from us.
10. IM HOPING THAT AS I CONTINUE TO SHATTER YOUR VIEWS ON HOW AND WHAT I SHOULD BE THAT YOU WILL FINALLY GET USED TO THE IDEA THAT I AM NOT PLAYING.
11. In the same breathe I will repeat to you that I am AUTISTIC (AND NOW HAVE A FORMAL DIAGNOSIS THAT SAYS SO) I will occasionally say and do things that make no sense to you because of the autism such as but not limited to, having an aversion to simple or complex things that I have attatched a not-so-great specific meaning to. YOu will see me sometimes stop eating for a period of days at times because of some far off superstition or binge eating when I have no other outlet.
MY BEST ADVISE IF YOU ARE TRYING TO FIGURE ME OUT IS TO STOP TRYING TO FIGURE ME OUT BECAUSE MY ACTIONS ARE TOTALLY RANDOM AND NOT PRE-PLANNED. THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I SUDDENLY BECOME AFRAID OF SOMETHING THAT DIDN'T SPOOK ME THE DAY BEFORE AND NONE OF MY PERSONALITY HAS TO DO WITH A GAME, SOMETIMES IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE TO ME EITHER.
12. My son's father is NOT the man from Canada/Maine and I have only been sexually active (intercourse) twice in three years so that rules him out and my sons due date was 10/12/2009 (He was three weeks early, if you do the math that rules out man from canada because the man from canada was in the picture for two days only and in the first half of November --- which would mean that I was pregnant for 11 months?--- I dont think so!!! Man from San Mateo is my sons father, we were together the first part of December.) SO QUIT CALLING ME A GROUPIE!!!!!! YOU ARE ALWAYS CONDUCTING YOUR RUINING OF MY LIFE BASED ON FALSE PRETENSES---ITS GETTING REALLY OLD.
13. Quit lying to key figures to get me in trouble, I have nothing what-so- ever against members of any organization including the president and I am not a threat to peoples safety, Im autistic and have normal autistic adversions as well as mannerisms including outbursts (that are now limited because of the medication...thank goodness for myself and everyone else too) I am learning how to better handle things internally without so much outward frustration, but your lies definitely are not helping.
14. If I take the bart, I am not advocating making anyone "starve" or global practices,....most likly I am looking for a job.
15. I've wanted rescue from this hectic existance of having to deal with people that destroy my life for sport for 6 years now and I have wanted the abuse to end. Im going on with my life because I cant not live any longer. Nothing is a game to me, this is my life and my sons also.
I AM AN INTELLIGENT AND VALUABLE PERSON THAT IS CREATIVE IN NATURE AND MOST OF THE TIME EXTREMELY GENTLE THAT CAN BE FUNNY AND A GREAT ASSET TO MANY.........IF YOUR ONLY GOAL IS TO HURT ME THEN I DONT UNDERSTAND YOUR EXISTANCE, NOR DO I WANT TO BE A PART OF SUCH AN ENVIRONMENT......PLEASE LEAVE ME OUT OF THAT....THE POSITION OF MAJOR JERK HAS ALREADY BEEN FILLED IN MY LIFE.
Sincerely
Laci Renee
Friday, October 30, 2009
How can you leave me and my child behind when I have repeatedly told you what the truth is, I'll try again....
I am autistic which means that I think backwards compared to you and that I remember and forget the same things all day long. One minute I remember I wasn't supposed to talk to a certain individual and the next you'll see me talking to that same individual because I have forgotten not only that I wasn't supposed to talk to them but I also forgot the risks involved.
Nothing I do is ever intentional to upset, hinder or hurt a person or situation. I am litterally struggling with autism.How lucky you are to not have this problem because not only is it frustrating for you when I dont do the right thing but in my world creates problems of being accused of purposely adding strife to situations but also leaves me alone most of the time and totally alienated from everyone and anyone that could help me.THEYare either under the impression that I dont care or that based on how things "look" that I am guilty of some transgression.
If you think that you are frustrated, remember that all it does to your life is "frustrate" you and then your off to continue to live your life. In my life here's what happens, I am frustrated and then beaten, kidnapped or raped, assaulted in some way or lied about to the point where my life is left destroyed and in shambles.
A perfect example is the fact that I have just listened to someone tell me that the following statement has been let out as public knowledge...."L Issel (ME) has attempted to pull tubes out of her infant child and that I "assaulted" one of the staff members of UCSF medical center.............THE PREVIOUS STATEMENT NEVER HAPPENED!!!!!!! Not only did it never happen but the false accusation makes me look as if I am some sort of lunatic. Not only that but I have people already trying to punish me for events that never transgressed.
Im still being threatened with a terrorist brig and I still have people making decisions whether or not to cut off my hands and fingers.......Why would anyone ever chop off someones hands or fingers to begin with?
Does anyone ever understand the level of fear that I live with when I find out that someone doesn't beleive my honesty?I am constantly being threatened and to you if someone doesn't beleive me then all it means in your world is that they think I am a lyer.........In my world them thinking Im a lyer leads to institutionalization, encarseration, physical assault, my child being yanked away from our bond, and possibly death. Why would I lie, I have too much to lose.
Im beyond tired of pleading with people to recognize the most basic of human rights. I am treated constantly as if I have no rights and because people had to lie about me to obtain positions of authority, fame or wealth I feel like me and my son will be constantly in jeopardy of a setup or of abuse. Im petrafied and you treat me as if I am trying to make the world think that I am some sort of princess (which by the way was never something I thought or was trying to make people believe but I now have people trying to make you think that I think so that you will think badly and possibly try and lynch me for)
Dont you understand that these people that are getting you all riled up against me do this for sport? They video tape your reactions, post them and all sit around and laugh as I get arrested, injected or assaulted. They make money turning you against me and they make money everytime I am abused and everytime it is viewed by large groups of people! This isn't something that I am participating in, this is something that is being forced on me and my child.
Nothing I do is ever intentional to upset, hinder or hurt a person or situation. I am litterally struggling with autism.How lucky you are to not have this problem because not only is it frustrating for you when I dont do the right thing but in my world creates problems of being accused of purposely adding strife to situations but also leaves me alone most of the time and totally alienated from everyone and anyone that could help me.THEYare either under the impression that I dont care or that based on how things "look" that I am guilty of some transgression.
If you think that you are frustrated, remember that all it does to your life is "frustrate" you and then your off to continue to live your life. In my life here's what happens, I am frustrated and then beaten, kidnapped or raped, assaulted in some way or lied about to the point where my life is left destroyed and in shambles.
A perfect example is the fact that I have just listened to someone tell me that the following statement has been let out as public knowledge...."L Issel (ME) has attempted to pull tubes out of her infant child and that I "assaulted" one of the staff members of UCSF medical center.............THE PREVIOUS STATEMENT NEVER HAPPENED!!!!!!! Not only did it never happen but the false accusation makes me look as if I am some sort of lunatic. Not only that but I have people already trying to punish me for events that never transgressed.
Im still being threatened with a terrorist brig and I still have people making decisions whether or not to cut off my hands and fingers.......Why would anyone ever chop off someones hands or fingers to begin with?
Does anyone ever understand the level of fear that I live with when I find out that someone doesn't beleive my honesty?I am constantly being threatened and to you if someone doesn't beleive me then all it means in your world is that they think I am a lyer.........In my world them thinking Im a lyer leads to institutionalization, encarseration, physical assault, my child being yanked away from our bond, and possibly death. Why would I lie, I have too much to lose.
Im beyond tired of pleading with people to recognize the most basic of human rights. I am treated constantly as if I have no rights and because people had to lie about me to obtain positions of authority, fame or wealth I feel like me and my son will be constantly in jeopardy of a setup or of abuse. Im petrafied and you treat me as if I am trying to make the world think that I am some sort of princess (which by the way was never something I thought or was trying to make people believe but I now have people trying to make you think that I think so that you will think badly and possibly try and lynch me for)
Dont you understand that these people that are getting you all riled up against me do this for sport? They video tape your reactions, post them and all sit around and laugh as I get arrested, injected or assaulted. They make money turning you against me and they make money everytime I am abused and everytime it is viewed by large groups of people! This isn't something that I am participating in, this is something that is being forced on me and my child.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Have I learned a lot in the last hours or what?
The Patels, who I sold a "living trust" to back in 2002, are participating in an all out grudge war against me that now includes my son.
I worked for a company called "Family First" based out of Freemont California.
What is the saddest thing ever is that not only was I honest with the Patel's but I actually loved their family. I would sit for extended periods of time interested and listening to stories of India, arranged marriages, children and all of their Gods. Probably what breaks my heart the most is that I was genuinely interested in them and their families and did my best to give them the plan that was best to protect thier families and their incomes.
I find out that they are participating in this effort to make it look like I somehow was dishonest and or that I ripped them off. I would never do that, especially to them.
My son is now being referred to in certain circles as "the commission" which totally freaks me out.
One thing that I know about the Patel's is that they will probably realize that this is a misunderstanding and no longer view me as some sort of bad person. They are all loving decent people.
The second thing is that I am being accused of "acting" again for absolutely no reason.
People keep making decisions about my life at hearings that are being held behind my back and adding additional unwanted people to my life.
What I am really dealing with in this never ending saga seems to be "Cruel Intentions".
Now I hear they are even making arrangements to send me to the same terrorist brig that they brought and abused me at in 2007. Why? I have no clue! im not a terrorist and never have been, but I was probably breathing again without permission, because they keep trying to punish me for things that I am either not aware of or have absolutely no knowledge of in the first place.
They keep calling me "okay" and using this word as a means to punish me some more and it seems as if the abuse is always justified by all of my agressors because they have never had to endure what they have been dishing out. Again....I dont even know what I did or didn't do to be considered "okay" I HAVE ASPERGERS SYNDROME AND YOU ARE PARTICIPATING IN MENTAL CRUELTY AND ABUSE.
I want my son back!!!!!!!!!!!!! I never even got to parent him, he's been in the hospital the entire duration of his life.
These people, in the last month, think that I am making deals for punishment of things that never happened. They abuse me constantly and then they think that I am making a deal with them if I "use the computer", or "go outside", things that are normal actions normally are suddenly turned into taboo things when I have to deal with them.
Im bleeding and cant even use the bathroom without them thinking I am against the "FEDS" or against some other government entity. They are rediculous about it.
I want my son back what they have done to my life is totally illeagal and the secret service knows that not only am i autistic but that what they are contributing to is totally unfair.
I want my son back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ihaven't done anything wrong or against the law and I dont always "know" what they accuse me of "knowing" until after the fact 99% of the time.
I worked for a company called "Family First" based out of Freemont California.
What is the saddest thing ever is that not only was I honest with the Patel's but I actually loved their family. I would sit for extended periods of time interested and listening to stories of India, arranged marriages, children and all of their Gods. Probably what breaks my heart the most is that I was genuinely interested in them and their families and did my best to give them the plan that was best to protect thier families and their incomes.
I find out that they are participating in this effort to make it look like I somehow was dishonest and or that I ripped them off. I would never do that, especially to them.
My son is now being referred to in certain circles as "the commission" which totally freaks me out.
One thing that I know about the Patel's is that they will probably realize that this is a misunderstanding and no longer view me as some sort of bad person. They are all loving decent people.
The second thing is that I am being accused of "acting" again for absolutely no reason.
People keep making decisions about my life at hearings that are being held behind my back and adding additional unwanted people to my life.
What I am really dealing with in this never ending saga seems to be "Cruel Intentions".
Now I hear they are even making arrangements to send me to the same terrorist brig that they brought and abused me at in 2007. Why? I have no clue! im not a terrorist and never have been, but I was probably breathing again without permission, because they keep trying to punish me for things that I am either not aware of or have absolutely no knowledge of in the first place.
They keep calling me "okay" and using this word as a means to punish me some more and it seems as if the abuse is always justified by all of my agressors because they have never had to endure what they have been dishing out. Again....I dont even know what I did or didn't do to be considered "okay" I HAVE ASPERGERS SYNDROME AND YOU ARE PARTICIPATING IN MENTAL CRUELTY AND ABUSE.
I want my son back!!!!!!!!!!!!! I never even got to parent him, he's been in the hospital the entire duration of his life.
These people, in the last month, think that I am making deals for punishment of things that never happened. They abuse me constantly and then they think that I am making a deal with them if I "use the computer", or "go outside", things that are normal actions normally are suddenly turned into taboo things when I have to deal with them.
Im bleeding and cant even use the bathroom without them thinking I am against the "FEDS" or against some other government entity. They are rediculous about it.
I want my son back what they have done to my life is totally illeagal and the secret service knows that not only am i autistic but that what they are contributing to is totally unfair.
I want my son back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ihaven't done anything wrong or against the law and I dont always "know" what they accuse me of "knowing" until after the fact 99% of the time.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
No, Im not making deals with stalking criminals
Ur done?????? All it took for you to want your normal existance back was what, a couple of weeks?????? Lucky you that you haven't been me all these years getting beaten raped and kidnapped and falsely accused of every crime on the planet. I wanted my life back 6 years ago, I was DONE then. While my income was being siphoned out of my writing and my blogs plagerized not to mention all my actual writing on paper, I was left to die outside with no regard for my hardship or safety. And now, your done. Well I wish that is all it took for me to get my life back to normal.
Now Im being threatened with being committed if I dont give my child up for adoption. My son, the one thing that I gave up fighting all of you monsters for was just to be left alone with him.
Dont ever accuse me of having an orgasm either just because I have his pictures near me at night...how sick can you get and how desparate.
Apparently all this happened to me because someone thought I was being "okay", whatever the hell that means.
Oh and now I'm supposedly getting a pardon for a crime that was made up in order for someone to look like the good guy once again and for me to look like the vagrant criminal once again. I dont need a pardon for something that didn't happen.
You are also participating in mental cruelty by not acknowledging my autism and to be quite honest I happen to love gay people (not the story you told).
I love my son and I am only securing his immeadiate future by involving a decent couple because I am treated with such little respect that Im worried for my sons care. I have a place to live now and the offer of a couple of jobs. I am stable despite your efforts to push my buttons and make me look psycho.
I am going to be a great mother, you took everything I ever had but not my son.
Im not stalking anyone and no i didn't want 2, whatever that means. Im autistic!
Now Im being threatened with being committed if I dont give my child up for adoption. My son, the one thing that I gave up fighting all of you monsters for was just to be left alone with him.
Dont ever accuse me of having an orgasm either just because I have his pictures near me at night...how sick can you get and how desparate.
Apparently all this happened to me because someone thought I was being "okay", whatever the hell that means.
Oh and now I'm supposedly getting a pardon for a crime that was made up in order for someone to look like the good guy once again and for me to look like the vagrant criminal once again. I dont need a pardon for something that didn't happen.
You are also participating in mental cruelty by not acknowledging my autism and to be quite honest I happen to love gay people (not the story you told).
I love my son and I am only securing his immeadiate future by involving a decent couple because I am treated with such little respect that Im worried for my sons care. I have a place to live now and the offer of a couple of jobs. I am stable despite your efforts to push my buttons and make me look psycho.
I am going to be a great mother, you took everything I ever had but not my son.
Im not stalking anyone and no i didn't want 2, whatever that means. Im autistic!
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